


A Shallow Grave.

by Wendihomo



Series: The Mind’s Eye [3]
Category: The Umbrella Academy (TV)
Genre: Addiction, Coping mechanism, Emotional Baggage, Emotional Hurt, Funeral, Grief, Guilt, Loneliness, Loss, Mourning, Number Five | The Boy Needs A Hug, Trauma
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-03
Updated: 2019-04-03
Packaged: 2020-01-04 09:50:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 554
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18341237
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Wendihomo/pseuds/Wendihomo
Summary: There was no real explanation as to why Five finds himself back at the rubble of the academy. They’re still dead, their bodies only ever growing colder and stiffer. Yet Five finds himself addicted to it, finds that he can not control the urge to simply hope and pray that one day he’ll go there and things will be different.





	A Shallow Grave.

**Author's Note:**

> The third instalment of my miniseries. Again I don’t believe this includes any triggering actions, behaviours or wording but if I am wrong please tell me so I can add some warnings.
> 
> Also a big thank you to everyone who has liked and viewed so far. I’m really flattered. Like always feedback is appreciated.

There was no real explanation as to why Five finds himself back at the rubble of the academy. They’re still dead, their bodies only ever growing colder and stiffer. Yet Five finds himself addicted to it, finds that he can not control the urge to simply hope and pray that one day he’ll go there and things will be different.

And for a little while that’s okay.  
For a little while Five manages with just hope, but like all things there’s a darker entity underneath. It clings to him like a second skin whenever he treks back home, it occupies his waking thoughts and screams at him in his sleep.  
They didn’t have him. Five can’t help but wonder if their death is all that different from what he’s experiencing now, the unavoidable fact that he’s alone.   
Five was lonely.

His addiction makes him a creature of habit. Every day he finds himself back there. He sits besides Allison, tells her how proud he is of all that she’d achieved, how much he thinks Claire looks like her and he brushed the settling dust away from her face- he knows how much Allison likes to maintain her image.

He speaks with Klaus too, telling him that it didn’t matter who he loved. That no matter what Reginald or anyone else said Five thought firmly that Klaus deserved to be loved, be from a man or woman. Five pulled down his sleeve too, covering the brand on his wrist. He knew Klaus hated it.

He brings an blanket for Luther. His overcoat was torn, exposing a mass of muscle and hair. Five wonders if the other siblings knew, if they realised how Luther hid himself away out of shame. Five told Luther that he’d keep his secret, that he thought Luther was still handsome. Five left the blanket with him, covering him neatly. His parting words are that Luther was a good leader, and a better brother.

He cries to Diego. Tells him that he can’t find Mom’s body, that he’d dug through rubble until his fingertips bled and his nails splintered. Five tells Diego he’d keep trying, that he knew how much Diego loved her. He promises Diego that he was more than just number two, tells him that he didn’t need to prove anything to anyone.

Five can’t find Vanya. It doesn’t matter how far he goes, how much rubble he shifts there isn’t a hair to be found or a trail to follow. Five instead talks to the wind. Five apologises for all that he—that they—had done wrong. Tells her if he could go back he would make things right. That he would try harder. He whispers to the wind that Vanya made the most beautiful music, and how much he wished he could hear another song.

It was late when he finally got back, dirt coating his palms and fingers and clothes knocked askew and shovel clutched tight in one hand. Five feels the way Dolores’ gaze burns through his skin. He clears his throat, turning to face her.  
“They’re at peace. I couldn’t…”  
Five doesn’t finish. He can’t bring himself to choke out the next few words. Instead Five offers her a weak smile and tries his best to convince himself that she understood. That she smiled back.


End file.
